


Don't You Forget About Me

by LianCatMeow



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Amnesia, Amnesia Iwaizumi Hajime, Angst, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Angst, Jealous Oikawa Tooru, M/M, Minor Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Pining Oikawa Tooru, Temporary Amnesia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:00:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23735008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LianCatMeow/pseuds/LianCatMeow
Summary: Three yearsThree years have passed ever since Oikawa Tooru left Japan and went to Argentina. Three years since he last talked to Iwaizumi Hajime, which ended into a massive fight. Three years and Oikawa still misses him, there was a massive hole in his life while he was in Argentina -  like an overstuffed closet ready to burst in any second. He was hoping and even praying that Iwaizumi will suddenly arrive in Argentina declaring his undying love for Oikawa but, shit like that only happens in movies.Their relationship is not like in the movies. It was years and years of yearning, adjusting, understanding with the silent gestures and touches, years of being in synch together, wanting and desiring the same thing -  and then suddenly, they no longer desire the same things.Suddenly, they’re no longer in synch.Suddenly, they’re no longer together.Suddenly, their relationship isn’t as perfect as they hope it would be.orIwaizumi Hajime suffered from temporary amnesia and Oikawa Tooru will do everything to bring back the relationship they lost.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji & Iwaizumi Hajime, Akaashi Keiji/Iwaizumi Hajime, Iwaizumi Hajime & Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 19
Kudos: 94





	1. Love lost

**Chapter One**

_**“If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered.”  
― Edgar Allan Poe** _ ****

_Three years_

Three years have passed ever since Oikawa Tooru left Japan and went to Argentina. Three years since he last talked to Iwaizumi Hajime, which ended into a massive fight. Three years and Oikawa still misses him, there was a massive hole in his life while he was in Argentina - like an overstuffed closet ready to burst in any second. He was hoping and even praying that Iwaizumi will suddenly arrive in Argentina declaring his undying love for Oikawa but, shit like that only happens in movies. 

Their relationship is not like in the movies. It was years and years of yearning, adjusting, understanding with the silent gestures and touches, years of being in synch together, wanting and desiring the same thing - and then suddenly, they no longer desire the same things.

_Suddenly, they’re no longer in synch._

_Suddenly, they’re no longer together._

_Suddenly, their relationship isn’t as perfect as they hope it would be._

* * *

**Tokyo Airport**

**January 5, 2019**

After the New Years’ celebration, Oikawa Tooru decided to come back home in Japan. His three-year contract with the Argentinian League as the setter for Atletico San Juan ended and it’s time to try out for Japanese Volleyball League teams, his goal hasn’t changed and he still has the insatiable desire to win. Standing in the crowded airport in a chilly winter afternoon wearing only a thin black coat, navy blue sweater and skinny jeans might be one of the stupidest decision ever. Turning around with his brown hair still in a perfect tousle, puffing his cheeks and slightly squinting his caramel brown eyes looking for his older sister. Then suddenly - 

“Tooru!”

Oikawa turned around and saw his not-so-little nephew Takeru running towards him at full speed, Oikawa opened his arms and hugged his nephew with a beaming smile. Oikawa ruffled Takeru’s hair and grinned “You’ve grown taller squirt, I thought you’ll be short as a shrimp forever.” Takeru stuck his tongue out and groaned “Stop calling me that! I’m second year in high school already, pretty cool huh?” He grinned and helped Oikawa carry his luggage, his older sister Mina smiled at the duo and wrapped her arms around Oikawa, giving him a tender hug. 

“I miss you Tooru, mom is constantly texting me asking if you arrived already.”

Oikawa smiled and pat his sister’s shoulder and replied dramatically “Tell mom that her beautiful son has arrived.” Mina rolled her eyes and elbowed his rib in response, the three of them walked out the airport with contented smiles on their faces. 

* * *

The trip to Miyagi was uneventful, other than Takeru’s constant chattering about his volleyball team and asking for souvenirs from Argentina. His older sister humming a Japanese pop song while driving and Oikawa staring at the window, his brown eyes are nervous yet excited. Then he asked 

“Mina-nii, have you heard anything about Iwa-chan?”

The humming of his sister suddenly stopped and his nephew choked on the soda he was sipping while frantically looking around, the grip of the steering wheel tightens as his sister quickly put on a cheery fake smile and replied “Oh, I haven’t heard much you know, I’m pretty busy with work and taking care of Takeru.” Oikawa frowned with their sudden change of attitude and replied “But we literally live next door to Iwa-chan’s house, you see him every day. Surely you must know something.” Mina shakes her head and insisted “I really don’t know Tooru, I haven’t spoken to Iwaizumi-san for a long time. Life moves on, you know.” She laughed and quickly glanced at the rearview mirror, Takeru gave a slightly panicked look at his mother.

Oikawa frowned even more and ignored the dull ache in his chest, he has a strong feeling that there is something they’re hiding from him - he’s not certain what it is about but he will figure it out. 

* * *

Arrive at home was chaotic in a good way, his mother showering him with kisses and his father ruffling his hair and patting his shoulders. The house was warm and lively - a stark contrast to the bleakness and dullness of the airport.

His mother pinched his cheeks and exclaimed

“Tooru! You’ve lost weight, what are you eating in Argentina?”

“Dear, he didn’t lose weight he gained muscle! Volleyball players are literally a ball of stamina.” His father grinned and squeezed Oikawa’s shoulder affectionately. 

Oikawa rolled his eyes as he has ushered inside the dining room, various Japanese food on the table and the scent of home-cooked meal never fails to warm his heart and make his stomach grumble - he truly misses home.

He misses the simple life he used to have.

Dinner time with his family is filled with endless conversation and catching up, warm laughter and teasing from his father and sister. His mother doting and kind giving him more portions of food and talking animatedly about her little garden at their backyard. Takeru talking about his friends in high school and their childish antics - it reminded of Oikawa his high school experience with Iwaizumi.

_Iwaizumi_

Oh god, how much Oikawa misses him. Like the bones of his body fractured without the light touch of _his_ Iwa-chan. How he misses their friendly banter, their late nights’ star gazing in the field of Miyagi, their mornings jogging around town, their afternoons playing volleyball.

Oikawa isn’t complete without Iwaizumi, like two pieces of a whole - they seemingly complete each other. That’s just how life goes, that’s how he thought everything should be. Going to university together, playing the same university team, living together, just being within arms reach without uttering a single word - Iwaizumi was his rock, the single person who will keep Oikawa steady in the chaos and waves he created.

_Argentina._

A place that becomes the catalyst that frayed their relationship into bits, it wasn’t supposed to end that way, they’re supposed to be _invincible_. Their relationship wasn’t supposed to end at all. Things are supposed to be different, it should’ve been-

“Hello? Earth to Tooru? Unless your brain went to outer space?” His sister Mina giggled as she picked the tofu off Tooru’s plate. Oikawa rolled his eyes and stuck his tongue out childishly and retorted “The aliens need to take me away before I spend another minute with you bullying me!” Warm laughter erupted in their table as the Oikawa family continued their meal.

Oikawa Tooru was somewhat happy, he tries to convince himself.

Three years without Iwaizumi by his side, things are vastly different but Oikawa feels the warm bubble inside his chest - knowing one way or another he will meet Iwa-chan again.

* * *

After dinner, he helped his mother clean out the dishes and placed the cups on the cupboard as he asked

“Mom, where’s Iwa-chan? Surely you told him that I’m back right?”

His mother stopped washing the dishes and looked at Oikawa with gentle eyes and replied “Oh, I haven’t spoken to Hajime-kun in a very long time Tooru.”

“What do you mean? They literally live next to us.” Oikawa crossed his arms and frowned

“Ah, Mina didn’t tell you? Hajime-kun and his parents no longer live in Miyagi. They transferred to Kyoto or Hokkaido, I’m not quite sure.” 

Oikawa eyes widen in shock and exclaimed “What? How come no one told me anything? Iwa-chan didn’t even contact me about it.” His mother looked away trying to change the topic while she places the dishes in the drying rack and replied “I really don’t know Tooru, I think it’s best that you rest up and sleep for a while. You must’ve been exhausted from your trip.” 

Oikawa wanted to ask more, there are endless questions that bubble into his mind and yet, realizing the Iwaizumi’s transfer was something that bugged him the most. After he went inside his childhood bedroom and lay down on his galaxy printed sheets, he grabbed his phone and texted a number that he hasn’t contacted in three years.

A single message that holds so much meaning for Oikawa

_‘Iwa-chan, I need to talk to you.’_

* * *

**JUMP Publishing House**

**January 5, 2019**

“Oy, Iwaizumi don’t overwork again today. It’s after New Year and you’re still working like the devil.” His co-worker Tendo Satori smiles as he spins around his chair with manic glee.

Iwaizumi Hajime raised his arm for a simple greeting and replied “I need to read these emails and concept designs before the meeting with our head editor. I can’t slack off since I’m going to Miyagi this weekend.”

“Boo! What a bore.” Tendo playfully throws paperclips towards Iwaizumi’s direction and laughs cheerily. 

“You’re heading back to Miyagi? Aren’t you supposed to have another check-up this weekend?” His other co-worker and close friend Akaashi Keiji placed a cup of coffee on Iwaizumi’s desk, Iwaizumi murmured “Thank you Akaashi, I contacted my doctor and told him I need to postpone my check-up. I need to get stuff out of the house and send it back to Kyoto specifically my mother’s vases and photo albums.” Iwaizumi sipped his black coffee and leaned back with a sigh. 

He runs his fingers through his cropped uncut spiky black hair as he adjusted his reading glasses that he only uses at the office. He still has a tan despite the cold winter in Tokyo, dressed in a plain white button-down, dark green sweater and black jeans. Akaashi’s sharp gray eyes bore towards him and he sighed

“Iwaizumi-san, are you going to be okay? Since your heading back to Miyagi?” Akaashi asked with sincerity, his sharp eyes are filled with concern. Iwaizumi looked at his friend, he knows he can’t bullshit his way through Akaashi, that man is a living microscope - he notices every single detail. 

“I’m not quite sure, I’m scared to see people that I don’t remember anymore. It’s going to be difficult for me to explain my situation with the accident that happened three years ago. Right now, there are still important pieces and people in my life that I fail to remember.” Iwaizumi sighed in defeat, he is honest and open towards Akaashi - there is a strong sense of comfort and familiarity around him. Akaashi nodded and grabbed his coffee mug and said

“I’m free this weekend if you want I can accompany you to Miyagi.” Iwaizumi shakes his head and retorted “You don’t have to Akaashi, I’m going to be fine-” 

Akaashi placed his hand on Iwaizumi’s wrist and smiled gently 

“Hajime, I insist. I’ll be there with you.” 

Iwaizumi quirked his lip giving a small smile and replied “I’m very grateful to have you as a friend Keiji.” Akaashi nodded and turned around, closing the office door. Tendo raised his eyebrow observing his co-workers and quirked his lips into a teasing grin as he continues to type on his computer.

Iwaizumi Hajime living three years of his life with memories fractured and dulled out - after the tragic accident that literally took everything away from him, his old life and his memories which causes him to suffer in temporary amnesia. His life changed drastically and yet, there are still pieces and holes in his heart that are waiting to be filled.

Living his life hallow and shelled out with little to no memories of his past.

* * *

Lunchtime rolled around with ease as Iwaizumi fits back into his hectic work schedule. The editors of JUMP Publishing scurry off to contact their mangaka and creating new concept designs for the upcoming spring season. Iwaizumi stretched his muscular arms and groaned

“Fuck, I’m exhausted.”

Tendo nodded as he adjusted his purple sweater and replied “Hell yeah, I can’t wait to have drinks with Wakatoshi-kun later.” Iwaizumi looked at him dumbfounded manner and asked "Is he your boyfriend?” Tendo barked a loud laugh and replied “What? No! He’s my former volleyball teammate, uh remember Shiratorizawa?” Iwaizumi purses his lips and shakes his head, it’s pointless trying to remember minuscule details like that when he can barely remember his friends in high school. Tendo looked at him with understanding eyes and replied “Well, it was your mission to defeat us and go to nationals but then Karasuno those fucking crows defeated Aoba Johsai during Interhigh. Then, Karasuno defeated Shiratorizawa during finals. Those fuckers.”

“Ah, I must’ve been really competitive when it comes to volleyball.”

Iwaizumi remarked as he flipped through the papers. Tendo released a wide grin and replied “Nope, you’re a pretty chill mom-type kinda guy. It was Oikawa your captain who was fucking intense when it comes to volleyball.”

_Oikawa_

The name ringed a bell in his memory. A name so familiar and foreign at the same time, it was as if he heard it for years and eternity. He stopped flipping through the papers and gaped towards Tendo, his ears are ringing with a dull static unsure what to feel or what do think when he heard that name. It feels like a long stretch of time when Tendo suddenly shakes his shoulder - 

“Yo, earth to Iwaizumi? You spaced out there for a second man, are you okay?” Tendo’s unnerving red eyes bore towards him with a hint of concern. Iwaizumi snapped out of his thoughts and replied “Yes, I’m fine. I just heard that name before, it was so familiar.” Tendo tilted his head and asked “Uh, which name? Are you talking about Wakatoshi? His full name is Ushijima Wakatoshi, I think you might remember him since he’s a bigshot pro-volleyball player now.”

Iwaizumi nodded in a distracted manner and gruffly replied “Yeah, maybe him.”

He turned around and looked back at his computer he still has a concept that needs to be emailed to his assigned mangaka. Tendo merrily exclaimed “Hey, to get your mind off work you can join me for drinks tonight, my old volleyball teammates will be there. It will be really fun!” He was about to reply when Akaashi walked inside their office carrying stacks of un-beta storyboards that needs to be proofread and quietly replied “I don’t think Iwaizumi-san would be interested in drinks tonight since he has to travel from Tokyo to Miyagi tomorrow, Tendo-san.”

Tendo stuck his tongue out and exclaimed “Ugh, what a bore Akaashi-san! You can join us if you want to.” Akaashi frowned and politely turned down the invitation, he glanced at Iwaizumi’s direction who was staring blanking at the computer screen - Iwaizumi’s green eyes are dulled down and distracted. His eyes say everything that his lips cannot communicate. Akaashi touched Iwaizumi’s shoulder and asked in a hushed tone,

“Hajime, are you really okay? Do you need someone to talk to?”

Iwaizumi looked up and saw Akaashi’s eyes filled with genuine concern, he nodded and went back to work.

The name Oikawa is still ringing in his head like a beat of a drum that never stops. He lost his memories of someone important yet, he doesn’t know who and why the name Oikawa bothered and tugged his heart so much.

* * *

It was 7:30 pm when he turned off the lights in his office, Tendo left early to have drinks with his friends and his other co-workers rushed out of the office for dinner and karaoke.

This routine stuck the most to Iwaizumi, it was boring, it was dull but it was safe. This office he started working after he was discharged from the hospital after his accident. The people he barely knows or had any prior connections in his past (other than Tendo who was merely an acquaintance in his high school days and Akaashi who was his friend during university). Iwaizumi didn’t ask for unpredictability or spur of the moment decisions or impulsiveness, he wants stability, assurance - 

_Safe_

The word struck him repeatedly, like an insult to an injury or rubbing salt on an open wound. That word felt like it was spat on his face with harshness and spite.

His phone lights up to notify a message from an unknown number.

_‘Iwa-chan, I need to talk to you.’_

Iwaizumi frowned deeply and his nose crinkle with confusion - there is only one thing in his mind:

_‘Who the fuck is Iwa-chan?’_


	2. Love Running Away

**Chapter Two**

_**"If our hopes and dreams come true, wish that I had more.  
Of this borrowed time, if only it would last a lifetime."** _

_**\- Borrowed Time by Cueshe** _

**Tokyo - Iwaizumi Apartment**

**January 6, 2019**

_“Iwa-chan!”_

_Melodic laughter, sunny skies, the scent of grass and sweat dripping on the forehead. The little child running past him like a flash of lightning, another ecstatic cheer_

_“Iwa-chan! Hurry up!”_

_Iwaizumi blinked sheepishly as he stared at his left hand clutching on his bug net, his skinny tan legs filled with band-aids and little scars from his childhood adventures. He was sitting on a fence looking at the clear blue sky._

_He doesn’t understand, he doesn’t remember but the voice is always calling out._

_‘Iwa-chan!’_

_‘Iwa-chan!’_

_‘Iwa-chan!’_

“Iwaizumi!”

A deep voice cut through his slumber, Iwaizumi opened his eyes and blinked owlishly trying to adjust with the sunlight directly hitting up, his blue curtains open letting the sunshine in his plain bedroom. He groggily rose and saw Akaashi standing on the doorway carrying a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Iwaizumi stifled a yawn and said 

“What are you doing here?”

Akaashi walked towards him and placed the coffee mug on the bedside table and sighed “You didn’t reply to my texts or answer my calls, I thought we’re heading to Miyagi today?” Iwaizumi inhaled the scent of freshly brewed coffee and nodded sleepily “Yeah we are but, do you have to get inside my apartment? The spare key is for emergencies, Akaashi.” Akaashi rolled his eyes and remained stoic while adjusting his cream sweater and brown cardigan and replied “I was worried, I’ve been standing in your apartment door for 30 minutes. I thought something happened to you.”

Iwaizumi nodded and sipped his coffee, inhaling happily and whispered “Don’t overthink Keiji, I’m fine.” He swung his legs off his plain blue comforter and stood up stretching his right arm. Akaashi stared at him almost as if he’s searching for an answer with Akaashi’s grey eyes lingering with longingness then he said 

  
“While you’re asleep you’ve been calling out _‘Iwa-chan’_. Iwaizumi, be honest” He paused and lowered his gaze staring at the carpeted floor and continued 

“Did you remember something in your dream?”

Iwaizumi paused and replied with sincerity “I didn’t see anyone, I just heard someone calling Iwa-chan. Oddly, I don’t remember anyone named Iwa-chan, did we have a classmate in university who has that name?” Iwaizumi looked at Akaashi’s direction. Akaashi glanced back and shook his head

“No, I don’t know anyone who’s name is Iwa-chan.” 

Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow and said “Well, I should get ready. We need to arrive in Miyagi before lunch.” He left his bedroom and went to the bathroom. Akaashi remains standing in the middle of the room, looking at the bare walls of Iwaizumi Hajime’s room. Old memories should remain buried in the past and never interfere, for it will cause more pain into their lives. Akaashi whispered 

“I’m doing this for him, this is for his good.”

He walks out of the bedroom and shuts the door, trying to convince himself and silence the conscience distressing his heart.

* * *

**Miyagi - OIkawa Household**

**January 6, 2019**

Oikawa woke up with the sunlight gently caressing his face, he never felt this relaxed or well-rested in a very long time. His training in Argentina is gruesome and draining yet he still feels content with the drastic progress he made. Ruffling his messy bed head that looks similar to a bird's nest (as what Iwa-chan told him when they’re kids), he glanced at his phone and thought to himself ‘ _No text message or a single reply from Iwa-chan.’_ Oikawa frowned and tossed his phone back on the bed with a slight pout on his lips

_‘I have no idea that Iwa-chan is this petty.’_

Oikawa groaned and stood up, stretching his arms and long limbs. He wants to spend his day catching up with his old friends and playing volleyball - maybe he can snoop around and ask about Iwa-chan’s whereabouts. As he descends downstairs greeting his mother good morning with a kiss on her cheek, he stares at the window facing towards the Iwaizumi household, the house that used to be warm and cherry is now dark and lonely _‘When did they leave Miyagi? Why did Iwa-chan not tell me anything? Is he hiding something?_ ’ 

“Blueberry pancakes for breakfast Tooru, your favorite.” His mother placed the freshly made pancakes on the table with a sweet smile on her lips. Oikawa looked up and beamed with delight and replied 

“I haven’t eaten this in years, thank you, mom.” He slowly ate his meal, his mind lingered and thought about Iwa-chan.

Oikawa is determined to find him and ask questions to make sense of the mess that’s going on right now.

* * *

Spending lunchtime with Hanamaki and Matsukawa takes him back to his high school days - except this time Iwaizumi isn’t around. They entered their favorite ramen shop located near Aoba Johsai, laughing about the stories they shared and reminiscing on their youth. 

Hanamaki exclaimed, “Even if you're a big shot volleyball star in Argentina, Oikawa you’re still a piece of shit.”

Oikawa choked on his ramen and yelled “Makki! We haven’t seen each other in three years and that’s what you will tell me?! I feel so betrayed!” Matsukawa roared in laughter as he sipped on his cold beer and grinned “Quit the dramatics you bitch, still the same old Oikawa. How’s Argentina? Got many ladies up your sleeve?” Raising his hand for a fist bump towards Hanamaki, Oikawa rolled his eyes and replied “For your information Mattsun, I’m too busy to entertain beautiful Argentinian women. Volleyball and working part-time isn’t a piece of cake.” the trio smiled towards each other and burst into a boisterous laugh and ate their lunch in comfortable silence - then Oikawa suddenly asked

“Do you guys know where Iwa-chan is staying? I tried to contact him last night but he didn’t even reply to my text.”

It was as if an ice bucket dropped into their comfortable silence making it tense as a sharp knife. Hanamaki quickly glanced towards Matsukawa with a panicked expression and replied sheepishly “Uh? I don’t know Oikawa, his family left Miyagi a few years ago. I’m pretty sure they went to Kyoto but he didn’t bother staying in touch with us.” Oikawa frowned and poked on the pork inside his ramen broth and replied

“Bullshit. Iwa-chan suddenly leaves Miyagi without contacting me or his high school buddies.” 

Matsukawa nodded in response when his phone suddenly rang, he briefly looked at the caller ID. His usually relaxed eyes immediately widened as he stumbled out of their ramen booth and exclaimed “I need to take this call, just continue eating.”

Oikawa looked at Matsukawa’s retreating figure out of the ramen shop as he suspiciously raised an eyebrow and continued eating his meal and remarked “The call must be pretty important for him to react that way huh?” Hanamaki nodded and pressed his fingers nervously, this gnawing feeling inside him is surging too much - there are some secrets best buried around Oikawa. 

* * *

It was supposed to be a lunch treat when Oikawa suddenly ended up spending the whole afternoon with Hanamaki and Matsukawa. They walked towards the old volleyball near Aoba Johsai and met up with his former volleyball teammates. Yahaba and Kunimi worked in the same newspaper company, Kindaichi works in a sports clothing company and Kyoutani is training to be a volleyball coach. The old gang is back except there is a hollowness surrounding them, it was suffocating and painful to see that Iwaizumi isn’t around to bask within their joyful presence. 

Oikawa was grateful for this short distraction, being able to spend time with his friends without the constant feeling to yearn for Iwaizumi to be with them. Their afternoon was spent practicing volleyball, light teasing and catching up. It was as if nothing between their team changed - everything brings back nostalgic memories. Oikawa cooed in delight as Watari showed pictures of his 4-month-old son. He even howled in laughter when Kyoutani and Yahaba started dating a year ago, now the two of them are living together in Sendai. Kunimi no longer has the dulled out and sour expression - instead, he looks much more content and lighter working on a job that he finds great interest in. 

Oikawa whispered towards Hanamaki “Bet Kindaichi and Kunimi are still not dating, would you look at those two waddling idiots.” Hanamaki snorted and laughed in response “Don’t say that, you and Iwaizumi act like that in high school. Except, you guys are ten times worse.”

Oikawa rolled his eyes and glanced towards Matsukawa, the former middle blocker was away from earshot as he paced around the snow-covered grass outside the volleyball court, his phone still pressed close on his ear and replied in fast and hushed whispers. 

“What’s wrong with him? He’s been distracted the whole afternoon.”

Oikawa pointed towards Matsukawa’s direction, Hanamaki raised his eyebrow lazily and replied “Ah, must be a work thing. Pretty busy since he was promoted to be the head architect for an upcoming project in Tokyo. Just don’t bother him Oikawa, Issei pretty stressed out.” He sips on his energy drink and watches his former teammates tossing the volleyball around. Hanamaki gritted his teeth as he felt his stomach doing flip flops again, it’s difficult to lie around Oikawa when the man standing in front of him is staring deep into his eyes, inspecting every single word uttered in his lips. 

Oikawa shrugged and stood up stretching his arms and grabbed the volleyball on the floor and exclaimed “Nah, it’s okay. Just tell Mattsun not to stress out since it causes premature wrinkles and he’ll be ugly and single forever.” He winks and poses a cheeky peace sign and runs towards the court joining the game.

Hanamaki sighed in relief and stepped out of the volleyball court as he approached Matsukawa’s hunched figure, still deep into the phone call. He heard the fragments of the conversation

“I know, Hanamaki and I kept him busy for the whole afternoon. Yes, I don’t think he’ll be home by the time you guys are finished.” Matsukawa glanced up and flashed a brief smile towards Hanamaki then continued with the conversation

“Akaashi-san, thank you for accompanying Iwaizumi. I’m sorry I can’t be there to help around, I have no idea that Oikawa was coming home this week. The guy is known for his theatrics, can you please send Iwaizumi my regards? As much as we want to see him again, Oikawa might get suspicious.” Matsukawa adjusted his winter coat and stared at the sky and nodded

“Yes, I-I don’t want him to be hurt again. He’s been through a lot. They shouldn’t see each other for a while. I understand, thank you Akaashi-san please stay safe when you get back to Tokyo.” He clicked his phone and ended the call, he leaned back on the bench and said 

“Ah fuck, I need a smoke after that conversation.” Matsukawa groaned and blinked his eyes lazily. Hanamaki sat next to him and asked “Iwaizumi is back in Miyagi? Why?”

Matsukawa tilted his neck and grabbed his lighter and cigarettes, slowly lighting the stick and placed it on his lips and inhaled the nicotine and replied “His mother asked him to get some vases and photo albums, there are people interested in buying their house. Thank god Akaashi accompanied him or else everything will be a fucking disaster.”

Hanamaki slowly suggested “What if we help in letting Oikawa and Iwaizumi meet again? A little push won’t hurt right?”

Matsukawa snapped and puffed the smoke out from his cigarette and replied “Are you insane? They’re not meeting again. End of discussion, remember when Iwaizumi saw us in the hospital? He went ballistic, he lost his memories and now we’re shoving the single person that caused him to spiral into a fucking emotional mess. You will not meddle and find a way for Oikawa to meet Iwaizumi, swear to it Takahiro.” 

Hanamaki widens his eyes and clenches his fist, this guilt is bubbling inside him for three years like an acid ready to burst. It’s impossible to pretend to be clueless when you know the truth. Gritting his teeth and replied

“Yeah, I promise.”

* * *

**Miyagi - Iwaizumi Household**

“Mom, I just don’t understand why we need to keep these vases? They’re kinda ugly.” Iwaizumi groaned as he pressed his phone closer to his ear while his hands are occupied wrapping the fragile vases individually with bubble wrap as he wrinkled his nose in a disapproving manner and replied in the phone call

“What? Of course not! No, I won’t throw it away. I will ship it to Kyoto safety and I’ll probably flip if you ask me to keep these extra vases in my tiny apartment.” He released an expatriate sigh of defeat and lowered his head like a child losing his favorite candy and replied in a forced polite manner “Yes mother, I’ll find a way to keep it safe. I promise, send dad my regards bye.” He ended the phone call and growled in defiance, staring at his phone as if his glare would make it burst into flames.

Akaashi sitting across Iwaizumi with a small grin on his lips and commented “Growling at your phone won’t help packing up these vases.” Iwaizumi looked at him and raised his hand in a defeated manner “Akaashi, my mother is probably insane for wanting me to keep half of her vase collection. Insane.”

Akaashi laughed and placed the boxes gently near the doorstep and tilted his head, his messy black curls ruffled with his fingers and commented “Hmm, I won’t mind keeping some vases. I have plenty of plants in my apartment. But in all honesty, who needs this much vases and photo albums?” He points at the tiny pile of photo albums on the floor.

“My mother and her hoarding tendencies.”

Iwaizumi released a hearty laugh and taped the box shut, he glanced at the photo albums stacked on the floor. Curious on what’s inside and the pictures that hold so many memories, he stretches his arm out - reaching towards the albums when Akaashi suddenly stepped forward blocking his actions and grabbed Iwaizumi’s arm firmly and said 

“No, Iwaizumi. I know you're curious but it won’t help you remember anything.” Akaashi’s sharp and stern eyes pierce through him; Iwaizumi furrowed his eyebrows and replied with the same level of firmness “I just want to take a peek. It won’t hurt anyone.” 

Akaashi patiently explained “I doubt it, I don’t want you to spiral again like before. The doctors said that it’s best if you let these memories come back to you naturally, not forcing yourself to remember people you barely know-” 

“Akaashi! That’s my problem! These people whom I used to know so much about are now fucking strangers in my eyes, these people that I care or shit, I might even _love_ someone and they don’t hold meaning to my life right now because...I-I completely forgot about who they fuck they are.” Iwaizumi lowered his eyes and frustratedly gripped his hair and whispered harshly 

“I’m trying so fucking hard to remember and every time I want to bring back those memories and look at the photos they’re just faces of strangers. Stranger that used to mean so much in my life.” Iwaizumi suppressed a sob coming out from his lips when he suddenly felt gentle arms wrapped around his shoulder. His head rested gently cradled like a child, Akaashi gave a tender embrace to Iwaizumi and whispered 

“It’s okay Hajime, take your time. You don’t have to force yourself, trust me.”

Iwaizumi released a tensioned exhale and suddenly tears poured down his forest green eyes, frustration and pent up anger towards himself and the hatred of fate for giving him this pain of amnesia. He tightened his hold of Akaashi and sobs harder even if it’s just a mere moment of vulnerability, all he wants is to remember again.

Akaashi held him closer for this is all he can do to help Iwaizumi ease his pain.

* * *

“Damn, I’m exhausted!”

Hanamaki exclaimed as he draped his arms over Matsukawa and Oikawa’s shoulders and continued their walk towards Oikawa’s house for dinner. “Oikawa, you merciless son of a bitch I thought I almost died when you served the ball near my face.”

Oikawa laughed loudly as puffs of winter cold smoke released from his chapped lips and replied “You’ve lost your touch Makki, you haven’t been practicing volleyball anymore?” Hanamaki groaned “I don’t have time, working as an engineer takes a toll on my exercise schedule.”

“Takahiro, don’t bullshit us, you never exercise and you spent so much time eating desserts, you lazy shit.” Matsukawa grinned as Hanamaki spluttered out his drink and hit Matsukawa’s shoulder continuing their friendly banter of insults and jabs.

The trio crossed the street as the sunset bleeds through the skies of Miyagi. The burst of orange, reds, and yellows that gave his sleepy town an ethereal glow. It was a hum of peace, the sense of belongingness almost giving Oikawa a sense of ease and relative calm. Hanamaki and Matsukawa’s hushed chatter filled the chilly winter air as they huddled closer, Oikawa was about to close his eyes and let himself back into this comfort when a flash of red caught his attention.

It was both a blessing and a curse to be ridiculously observant and keen like Oikawa, this heightened sense of observation is extremely useful during volleyball matches to probe and dissect his enemies' weaknesses like a mad scientist but, this time his memory _rarely_ fails him. It was like everything was in slow motion - just like in the movies.

A red Lexus car with a Godzilla and alien sticker at the back, the windows aren’t completely tinted and one window - in the driver’s seat was rolled down. The side profile of the driver can be seen briefly but Oikawa memorizes every single minuscule detail of this person. He can describe this man with his eyes closed and still get the perfect imagery. 

Strong and crisp jawline, messy spiky black hair, the upturn of his nose, the furrowed brows, the skin that has it’s natural glowing tan all year long - flawless and blemish-free despite not having a single ounce of vanity in his being. The lips that seemingly always display a frown but when he smiles the world lightens up with him and beams back. This man was effortless, manly and undoubtedly kinder and honest compared to anyone he ever met in the world.

It was a brief second but it was impossibly one of the longest moments of his damned life.

_“Iwaizumi.”_

Oikawa whispered as if he saw a ghost. Three years of not seeing him and he’ll surely be damned if he only gets to see him for a brief second. He paused at the sidewalk and gaped, his eyes widened and his breath almost halted with the sight that can never be erased from his memories. Then it occurred to him, releasing a loud and thundering shout - praying and hoping that this man can hear him cry out.

“IWA-CHAN!”

* * *

“Iwaizumi, can we please roll up the windows? It’s getting way too cold.”

Akaashi slightly shivers to huddle into a ball, his navy blue scarf draped over his neck cocooning him for warmth, his cream sweater and brown cardigan are pressed closer into his lithe body.

Iwaizumi glanced at Akaashi’s direction and threw his cigarette out of the window and gruffly replied “Ah sorry, I’ll turn on the heater.” He pressed the button to quickly roll up the windows of his red Lexus car with the strangest Godzilla and alien sticker at the back. His hands-on the steering wheel as he speeds faster since they plan on arriving in Tokyo before 9:00 PM, rock music filled their comfortable silence. Boxes of vase placed at the back seat of his car and labeled for him to deliver out to his mother tomorrow. Iwaizumi looked at the sunset in Miyagi the orange, red and yellow hues almost turning into indigos and various shades of purple as the sun lower into the dark, Iwaizumi commented

“This place is too beautiful and holds too many memories that I don’t remember now. I wonder who I spent my childhood watching the sunset or star-gazing with before I lost my memories.”

Akaashi looked at him with almost a sympathetic look on his steel-grey eyes and whispered 

“Huh, I wonder who.”

Iwaizumi didn’t realize that someone called out his name before he completely rolled up the windows. Iwaizumi didn’t realize that all this time the person he forgot was just a moment and a second away from him.

Iwaizumi Hajime didn’t realize that everything will unfold naturally and memories that were buried and lost - will one way or another come back to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh, I'm so thankful for the kind comments and kudos (my heart!!) especially with the people who sent questions on my Tumblr (liancatmeow.tumblr.com). Also, this is slow burn fanfic and there's gonna be lots of angst (and drama!!) in the next chapter so please be patient. Suggestions are always welcomed and you guys can message me anytime. And yes, I'm a low-key IwaAka (Iwaizumi x Akaashi) shipper THEY LOOK SO FUCKING GOOD TOGETHER WTF. (I'm not spilling beans who will be in the endgame w/ iwa grr this is a spoiler-free zone). 
> 
> Thank you so much, please stay safe and stay healthy. See you in the next update!


	3. Love Doubted

**Chapter Three**

_**"A laugh and a kiss** _   
_**A toast for the love and the memories we'll make** _   
_**The waters you inspire, my burning desire"** _

_**\- Desire by Hale** _

**Tokyo - Iwaizumi’s Apartment**

**March 5, 2019**

**Two months later**

_“Iwa-chan!”_

_This voice is ringing inside his head again, calling out the strange name repeatedly. This time the voice is no longer laced with child-like innocence but much older and a little bit mature but it still carries the light tune. The childish whine of this stranger’s voice never seems to age._

_“Hey, Iwa-chan are you listening to me?”_

_Iwaizumi blinked slowly and stared at his hands holding a volleyball, his shoulders draped with navy blue and white colors. Across from him is a figure standing in the middle of the volleyball court, wearing the same jacket but Iwaizumi can’t see the face of this person, just the silhouette. The school seal of the jacket stood out the most,_

_‘Kitagawa Daichii Middle School’_

_Iwaizumi briefly remembers ‘Mother told me that I used to study there, what’s going on?’_

_The same voice rung again like an echo in his memory_

_“Iwa-chan, I will always toss the ball to you.”_

_“We’re invincible together, Iwa-chan.”_

_“Things are changing and I promise we'll be together forever, Iwa-chan.”_

_Iwaizumi stood there trying to figure out who this person was standing in front of him, the figure was blurred out and almost impossible to recognize with his vision. Iwaizumi shut his eyes clutching the volleyball harder - his head feels like floating and spinning, turning into overdrive, he doesn’t understand where he is or who’s he with, the memory seems to be distant and detached from his present life._

_“Is this a memory?” Iwaizumi wonder out loud._

_The voice that never seems to stop ringing and echoing._

_‘Iwa-chan’_

_‘Iwa-chan’_

_‘Iwa-’_

Iwaizumi gasps as he sits upon his bed, his breathing labored and deep turned into shaken pants. He stared at his hands, trembling with a mixture of fear and uncertainty, pressing his fingers on his temples trying to calm the storm inside his head.

“Is this a memory? What the fuck is going on?” he mumbles to himself - glancing at the clock which indicates the time

**3:00 AM**

Too damn early to get ready for work or do anything semi-productive yet, he’s afraid of sleeping again. He’s afraid of other memories that might unravel in his dreams. Iwaizumi turned on the lamp next to his bed, grabbing his pen and small Moleskine notebook - a gift from Akaashi during Christmas. Dreams are the gateway to his memory. Maybe writing down his dreams can help him figure out who is this _‘Iwa-chan_ ’ and why is that name occurring and repeatedly appearing in his dreams. 

* * *

**Miyagi Train Station**

**March 5, 2019**

Oikawa Tooru stood at the Miyagi Train Station heading for Tokyo, today is another gruesome training session with the Japanese National Team. He was _finally_ scoured to join them ever since the word spread of his arrival back in Japan and no longer participating in the Argentinian league teams. It gave Oikawa a sense of pride and joy that the team he was _desperate_ to join years ago - are now begging him to become their setter. 

He visits Tokyo three times a week for his weekly training with the regular members, if he continues to improve on his performance he might have a shot on being part of their starting lineup then he will need to find an apartment near his training center and live in Tokyo for daily practices. The cold winter was slowly drifting away as spring was slowly seeping through their bones as the snow thawed in the outskirts of Miyagi. He stared blankly at the window facing towards the scenery of Miyagi and the blurred trees and mountains, a sense of despair aching in his throat as he remembered what happened exactly two months ago.

**Flashback:**

**Miyagi - Two months ago**

“IWA-CHAN!”

Oikawa screamed on top of his lungs at the streets of Miyagi, Hanamaki and Matsukawa spun around and quickly dragged out of the sidewalk. Oikawa pushed his friends away with harshness and frustration and screamed towards them “Fuck off!” As he madly dashed towards the main road hoping he can get a glimpse of the red car again. He was running like his life depended on it, his eyes were blurred out and his breathes were labored and shallow. No matter how good of a volleyball player he is, Iwaizumi or the thought of Iwaizumi always - _always_ send Oikawa into an overdrive of emotions.

Oikawa stood in the middle of the street panting like a mad man, there is no sign of the red Lexus with a Godzilla and alien sticker - there is no sign of Iwa-chan. He placed his hands on his knees and released an anguished cry, like the voice in his throat webbed into deep broken despair, he’s gulping air like a drowning man except for this time Oikawa is drowning and needs Iwaizumi to save him.

“What the _fuck_ is wrong with you?!”

Matsukawa yelled at him grabbing his jacket and harshly dragged him off the street and towards the secluded part of the sidewalk, Oikawa lowered his gaze as he was slammed on the concrete wall next to the bakery. The sharp eyes of Matsukawa pressed towards him as the taller man yelled

“The fuck is wrong with you Oikawa? Are you insane? Running out there chasing a random car and you don’t even know-”

“Iwa-chan was driving the car Mattsun! I saw him with my two fucking eyes!” Oikawa screamed as Matsukawa grabbed his shoulders and slammed him harder on the wall and lashing out

“So?! What’s the fucking point of seeing him again? Rubbing on his face that your a fucking big shot volleyball player now?! You _selfish bastard_ , you ruined him when you disappeared and went to Argentina without saying goodbye! You ruined him for making him choose between his life here and your fucking life there - you destroyed him and broke his damned heart!” Matsukawa pants harshly, his fists are quivering as Hanamaki places his hand on Matsukawa’s forearm and whispers

“Issei, calm down. Look at Oikawa.” 

Oikawa heaves out deep shaky breaths, his cheeks are drenched with sweat and tears. His lips curled into an anguished grimace as he broke into desperate sobs and whispered 

“I-I...I just want to see him again and apologize. I-I’ve been thinking about him everyday… even if I’m in Argentina. A-All the memories we shared made me _miss him_ more. I-I..love-”

_“Don’t you fucking dare say that you love him.”_

Matsukawa quipped with a cruel glare on his eyes as he pulled away from Oikawa and staggered out the sidewalk and mutter

“You destroyed him, he doesn’t love you anymore Oikawa.”

Matsukawa walked away from them with his hands inside his coat and shoulders hunched down, the sky is no longer bleeding in orange, yellows and red hues - it’s dark and lonely. Hanamaki gave Oikawa a sympathetic glance and followed Matsukawa, their figures disappeared out of Oikawa’s line of sight as the January snow fell, Oikawa slid down on the wall, bent down and hugged his knees.

The pain he caused towards Iwaizumi might be impossible to fix. 

**Flashback end**

_‘Now arriving at Tokyo Station, again now arriving at Tokyo station.’_

The announcement jostles Oikawa from his thoughts, he glanced around and stood up walking towards the exit of the train, his bag tightly slung across his shoulder. The crowded train station, the buzzing of employees, and workers all over the city with their quick pace rushing towards their officers and respective jobs. Oikawa stepped out of the station and leisurely walked towards Tokyo Metropolitan Gymnasium, his jacket wrapped around him tightly as he quickened his pace. 

Standing pedestrian crossing waiting patiently for the green light as he scrolls through the contact in his phone, he texted Kuroo:

_To Kuroo-chan:_

Kurooo-chan!! I’m in Tokyo already, text me if the other teammates have arrived ty <3

_From Kuroo-chan:_

Oiks hey broooo, Ushiwaka arrived early talking about health shit article annoying ughh, Sakusa is here to been spraying some weird disinfectant shit

_To Kuroo-chan:_

Aw shucks :(( the locker room is gonna smell like a weird disinfectant again grr heard we got a new libero?? Deets??

_From Kuroo-chan:_

Yuhh, his name is Nishinoya used to train in Italy, he’s also Karasuno’s libero. Oiks broo, I need to bounce, Ushiwaka is saying some weird shit about fertile volleyball soil ttyl

Oikawa groaned in annoyance and rolled his eyes _‘Ushiwaka is such an annoying teammate, what a fucking piece of shi-’_

While walking in the crossing he accidentally bumps on someone’s shoulder which causes the stranger’s folder and envelope falling on the pavement, this person quickly grabs his things and stuffs it back inside his leather bag. Oikawa bent down and handed him the folders and envelopes on the ground and murmured “I’m so sorry, I was distracted.”

The man shakes his head and replies casually “No, it’s fine. I was in a rush.” The man glanced up and his steel-grey eyes with long curved lashes and curly unkempt black hair, wearing a grey coat and blue turtleneck sweater as the man’s eyes widen and the color of his face drained out making him look paler than before, he grabbed his fallen items quicker than lightning. Oikawa stood away from him as the man stuffed more papers harshly inside his bag and bowed apologetically and whispered in a panicked voice

“I-I need to go now. Excuse me.”

Oikawa stood there in shock and whispered to himself “He looks familiar.” He shrugs and walks towards the gymnasium, hands-on his pocket as his thoughts drifted away.

* * *

**Tokyo - JUMP Publishing House**

Akaashi pants deeply inside the elevator like he was being chased by dogs, he leaned his back and slipped down on the cold elevator walls and closed his eyes almost praying that this was a nightmare.

_‘No, this is not a nightmare. That was Oikawa Tooru, I’m certain.’_

He whispered as he released a shuddered breath, his anxiety was peaking into an all-time high he couldn’t control the shaking of his hands and the harshness of his breath. The elevator feels suffocating and closing him in, his chest is constricted with whatever damned panic rising above him and the urge to vomit was so strong. His lips are trembling and chapped from biting it too hard, he can’t hear anything, everything is static and his senses are numbed out. He pressed his fingers on his teeth, biting it harshly so that it drew blood out.

_Ping_

The elevator door opened, Akaashi couldn’t see what or who embraced him and carried him out of the elevator with tenderness. His eyes shut down as tears silently fell on his cheeks, the scent of woody musk and brewed coffee filled his nose and a deep calm voice that snapped him back to reality.

“You’re always taking care of me Keiji, that you forget to take care of yourself.”

Akaashi looks up and saw Iwaizumi carrying him out of the elevator, his green eyes usually guarded and walled are now soft and kind, he gripped Akaashi tighter pressing him closer into his chest as they headed towards the office break-room, away from the lingering gaze of their co-workers and the curious stares of Tendo who was holding a cup of coffee. Iwaizumi sat him down on the couch and grabbed a water bottle, giving it to Akaashi.

No words are exchanged or nosy questions released just comfortable and calming silence. Iwaizumi grabbed his first aid kit and took band-aids out, he gently placed Akaashi’s bleeding fingers on his lap and dabbed cotton balls soaked in alcohol, wrapping his fingernails with a small Godzilla designed band-aid, he commented “I don’t understand why my past self is so obsessed with Godzilla, I have too many Godzilla merchandise at home.”

Akaashi nodded and wiped his tears with a tissue and replied “I-If you want, we can watch the original Godzilla movie. It might help you remember.” Iwaizumi quickly smiled and said “Someday, it’s just... Today I want to take care of you Akaashi. You’ve done so much for me, too much I don't know how to repay you.” Akaashi can feel another tidal wave of tears swelling on his eyes ‘Tears of guilt.’ his brain supplies as he can still remember the expression Oikawa gave to him when they bumped on the street and he choked out

“I..I don’t think I deserve your kindness Iwaizumi, I-I haven’t been-”

“Stop with this nonsense, you are the single most selfless person I’ve met. Three years of helping me regain my memories, three years of you holding my hand when I’m lost, three years of actually genuinely caring for me. I want you to know that I’m here for you, no bullshits.” Iwaizumi firmly replied with a small quirk on his lips, he stood up and grinned widely like the world orbits into Iwaizumi’s smile and said 

“Whenever you're ready, you can come back to the office. Right now, just take your time.” he turned around and was about to leave the room when Akaashi said, “You're not curious why I had my panic attack earlier?” 

Iwaizumi leaned on the doorway and thoughtfully said “You don’t have to explain anything to me Akaashi, nobody owes you an explanation for you to feel that way. I trust you, and I know whatever happens - it was for a reason.” Iwaizumi waves his arm and leaves the room.

Akaashi sat on the couch drowning in both guilt and unfiltered feelings of _love_ and admiration. The weight on his chest feels lighter now as he touches the Godzilla band-aids covering his bleeding finger, he wants to keep Iwaizumi’s smile for himself - for he helped build back Iwaizumi into who he is now.

* * *

**Tokyo - Tokyo Metropolitan Gymnasium**

Oikawa arrived at the Tokyo Metropolitan Gymnasium with a small cheeky grin on his lips, he waves good morning towards Kuroo and Sakusa and he rolled his eyes childishly towards Ushijima. Nishinoya their newly scouted and super energetic libero bounced towards Oikawa with a wide grin on his face and exclaimed excitedly 

“Dude, you went to Argentina huh?”

Oikawa removed his shirt and nodded “Yes I did Noya-chan. Playing for the Argentinian league team isn’t half bad, makes you learn new things every day, and gain experience too.” Oikawa flips his hair dramatically as Nishinoya places his hands on his hips posing like a superhero and asked with curiosity

“You’re insane for doing that! Literally! Don’t you have a boyfriend or something? That dude from Seijoh, the super awesome ace! Did he go with you to Argentina?” Oikawa paused and stared at the libero’s honest question, he does not know how to respond and how did this little libero know about his previous relationship with Iwa-chan, Oikawa nervously chuckled and responded

“W-Well, before I left Japan Iwa-chan and I got into a fight. Nothing too serious-”

“It was serious enough that the two of you broke up.”

Ushijima interrupted the conversation, dressed in his training gear and his eyes bore towards him like spotlights judging every single movement, Oikawa growled “You don’t seem to be a type of person who listens to gossip Ushiwaka-chan~” Oikawa’s voice was laced with fake sweetness, Ushijima raised an eyebrow and responded, “Actually, it was Tendo who told me about it.” Oikawa stepped towards Japan’s ace and points his fingers angrily at him and punctuated his words with a murderous glare “You don’t have a _fucking_ place to say that, you don’t even understand what a relationship means. Do me a favor and _fuck off_.”

“What I do understand is that if you truly love someone, you won’t suddenly book a flight to another country without saying goodbye.” 

Ushijima replies calmly with his ‘ _no-nonsense’_ tone, there is no jab or sarcasm laced on his voice, just cold hard truth. Japan’s ace left the locker room while the other players stood awkwardly trying to ease the tension inside the room, Oikawa looks down on the tiled floor - he does not have enough words to defend himself. 

* * *

“Oikawa!! You’re playing differently today. Is there something distracting you?”

His national team coach approached Oikawa with a stern look on his face, Oikawa wiped the sweat off his forehead and shook his head “No, coach I’m fine. I’ll improve myself, train harder, and be better next time.” He promises with a determined look on his eyes. His coach nods and blows the whistle signaling the end of their morning training, as his coach continues “You better improve Oikawa or else you might not be our starting setter for the upcoming exhibition match with the South Korean volleyball league team.” 

Oikawa stood there gaping with the information given to him as he slowly replied with excitement rushing on his exhausted muscles “I’m going to play as the setter for the upcoming game?” His coach gave a small grin and nodded “Hell yeah. That’s why you need to pack your stuff in Miyagi and transfer here in Tokyo. We’ll be having more training to boost your performance, this will be your debut match. It better be damn worth the shot.”Oikawa felt the pride swelling in his chest and a large smile blossoms on his sweaty face, he knows - he just _knows_ that this is one of the moments he was waiting for. All the sacrifices he made, all the tears he shed, all the heartache from leaving Japan to Argentina, all the loneliness and nights of overworking himself into the brink of exhaustion. This moment his grand debut as the rising star setter of the world-famous Japanese National team and he replied with fervor and determination

“I won’t fail you, sir!”

* * *

“Someone’s happy~”

Kuroo exclaimed in a sing-song voice as the team gathered inside the locker room changing their sweaty uniforms into cleaner casual clothing. Oikawa closed his locker and gave a cheeky grin “Of course I am! Coach told me I'll be the starting setter for our upcoming exhibition match with South Korea, my debut match and the whole world will be watching me!” he grabbed his phone and unlocked it excitedly, Kuroo tries and miserably fails to tame his messy bed hair and commented

“You know, when I first heard I’m going to be part of the starting team on my debut match I immediately knew deep down who will be the first person I want to share this news with.”

Oikawa lifted his head and stared at the taller man with curious eyes, as Kuroo continued looking fondly at the lock screen of his phone - a picture of Kuroo, Kenma, and their 2 cats. “I immediately called Kenma because I know he’ll be genuinely happy for me. It’s strange but I just want his assurance, you know?” Kuroo turns around and smiles widely, his cheeks hinted with a faint shade of pink to show a bit of bashfulness. Then he said “Oiks, when you first heard of this news who is the first person that popped into your mind? Who do you want to celebrate this moment with?”

Oikawa stood in the middle of the locker room unsure what to say, his hand clutching even tighter on his phone with his head lowered dazing down on the dull floors. He knows deep down who he wants to talk to but he’s not sure if this person still wants him - as much as Oikawa desires to be with him again.

“Kuroo, I hurt this person so badly, I was selfish.” Oikawa whispered, then continued “You remember what Ushiwaka said earlier this morning? All of it was true, I left when shit got tough - I ran away. _I was a coward_.” Oikawa confessed.

Kuroo places his hand reassuringly on Oikawa’s shoulder and patted it with brotherly affection, “You’re being a coward if you continue to let your guilt control your decisions. Face it head-on, tell him what you feel.”

After that Kuroo closed his locker shut and grabbed his sports bag and said “Well, I need to bounce Kenma and I are going to have lunch together. I hope you get your shit sorted Oiks!” He waves politely and bows goodbye to the rest of his teammates. Oikawa stood in the middle of the locker room, heart pounding as he grabbed his phone and tried to type a text message. His first message was left on read and never replied after 2 months of waiting. Then he deletes his message, then types again and deletes again. He was nervous and anxiety-ridden, unsure he could message Iwaizumi again after pushing him away in his life and packing his things and leaving without saying goodbye. 

“I’m a coward.”

He murmured as he pressed his palms on his face and breathed deeply as he sat down on the bench with his hands and phone pressed on his forehead, nervously deciding if he should message him or not.

_‘Maybe he won’t respond, he’ll leave me on read like last time?’_ His thoughts weigh heavily on his shoulders - over one stupid text message.

_‘He’s ignoring me, he has every right and reason to do it.’_ Another one of his internal voices echoes inside his head.

It doesn’t matter to him anymore, he won’t be controlled with his guilt. Oikawa quickly types out a message and presses sent. Even if it will take him a hundred or thousand text messages for Iwaizumi to reply - he will still do it in a heartbeat.

* * *

**Toyko - Umetaro Cafe**

From: Unknown number

_‘Iwa-chan, I’m so happy!! I’m going to be the starter setter for the upcoming exhibition match against South Korea. You better be there cheering for me or else I’m going to throw away your Godzilla collection~ I hope we can see each other soon!’_

Iwaizumi glances at the text message on his phone. He was standing in the counter waiting for his order at the cafe that is a 10-minute walk from his office which is conveniently across the Tokyo Metropolitan Gymnasium and their National Park. He was craving for milk bread and roasted black coffee, as this cafe is popularly known for their sweets. It was strange since his friends told him that he used to dislike milk bread but now Iwaizumi craves for it - as if milk bread can help him find an answer to unlock his memories. His close friend and coworker Akaashi was in the bathroom as Iwaizumi patiently waits for his order and reading the text message twice and thought,

_‘It’s this unknown phone number again.’_

The word ‘ _Iwa-chan’_ was ringing in his head bothering even in his sleep, the word that is constantly present ever since he received the first text message two months ago. It never failed to bother him and give him this aching feeling that something is missing - a big puzzle piece in his life that he completely forgot about, as if wiped out from his memories.

_‘Iwa-chan’_ seems to be significant in his memories but Iwaizumi no matter how desperately hard he tries to remember he really can’t recall who said that word constantly _‘Is it the name of my high school friend? Do I have a friend named Iwa-chan?’_ he ponders even more as he was about to type out a reply to the unknown number when his order was called

“One black coffee and milk bread on the go for Iwaizumi!”

Iwaizumi raised his head and slipped the phone inside his pocket opting to ignore the text message and went to the counter to grab his order and politely thanking the barista. He turns around and bumps onto someone, this man - this _lunatic_ forcefully grabs Iwaizumi’s shoulders with a trembling strength and shaky hands.

The beautiful stranger who was an inch taller than Iwaizumi with perfectly styled chestnut brown hair that looks airy and fluffy, his eyes are blown wide and in a light shade of brown but there is a hint of glassiness and glistening with tears ready to be shed. Pale skin with cheeks flushed from a combination of sweat and anxiety, lips are trembling as the words spill out his mouth like a fervent prayer and a whisper

_“Iwa-chan… I-I miss you.”_

Iwaizumi Hajime politely pulls away from the stranger’s touch as if the man burned his skin. Iwaizumi’s hands are cold, formal, and distant. He pulls his body a foot away from the stranger, a year's worth of distance between them. His words are sharper and much more painful than a knife piercing into an open flesh wound multiple times, Iwaizumi asked with sincerity and honesty looking at the stranger with no hint of recognition in his sharp forest green eyes.

“I’m sorry, but who are you?”

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3 is finally here! I must admit I'm having difficulties on how to continue this fanfic (i have an outline of everything but I'm still hesitant on how to move it forward). Also, I realized I can make 10k word fanfic but I'm STRUGGLING on making a 5k word essay for my online class. Mygoshhh, give me the power to write a decent essay *fingers crosses* thank you for the support and stay safe! See you in the next update!

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written fanfic in YEARS. I went on a three-year fanfic hiatus (I've been busy with university lately). I really appreciate kudos and comments and suggestions for the next chapter, I'm pretty sure amnesia AUs are repeatedly done but I just want something a lil angsty. Visit my Tumblr liancatmeow.tumblr.com for more Haikyuu!! content. See you in the next update, stay safe!


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